I’m not sure why audiences and critics were so harsh toward POSEIDON, Wolfgang Peterson’s remake of the inexplicably Oscar-winning 1972 disaster flick THE POSEIDON ADVENTURE, as it’s a perfectly acceptable, escapist summer movie. A boat flips, people die. What more do you want?

But how does it compare to Paul Gallico’s original 1969 novel, the basis for them both? Like the book, POSEIDON wastes precious little time getting the giant wave to tip that cruise ship upside down. I think it’s chapter 5 on your DVD player, and Peterson (director of the equally water-logged THE PERFECT STORM and DAS BOOT) milks the spectacle for all its worth. What is interesting is how this causes the film to suffer in character development, whereas Gallico was able to give you background on his large cast in the 27 pages before he rolled that sea vessel over. Here, you’re reduced to extremely simplified personalities that pretty much begin and end with the stars’ images; for example, Kurt Russell is basically playing Kurt Russell, with Josh Lucas doing Josh Lucas. And the rest of the cast includes Hot Daughter, Single Mom, Token Kid, Expendable Minority and Fussy Richard Dreyfuss – who, because he wears an earring – doubles as The Gay Guy.

Ultimately, as a special-effects action-adventure, that doesn’t matter. Nor does the fact that none of the characters share the same names or roles as Gallico’s novel or the first film. You could put any mix of people in this concept and it would still work to some degree. That Russell still harbors nice-guy charisma and Emmy Rossum sports wet cleavage through the whole thing helps even more. It even has bite, with one person in particular meeting a gruesome death worthy of a slasher flick. Like the book, Peterson’s film could be accused of a little racism, if subconscious, doing away with almost all the Latinos and blacks in one fell swoop. Just seeing Andre Braugher in the role of the ship’s captain is an automatic death knell.

One thing the movie does better than the book is giving water a sense of real menace. It’s one thing to read about it; it’s another entirely to see people trapped in closed quarters with the water level rising. Claustrophobia is very real, and POSEIDON takes advantage of that.

So for a disposable thriller with good special effects, Snake Plissken and a little Fergie ass-shaking, POSEIDON will do you right for a night’s rental, even if Gallico’s novel will do you better.

Oh, and sorry, folks: No POSEIDON rape here. –Rod Lott

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