The Elongated Man is no different from other pliable stretchers of the comics like Plastic Man or Mr. Fantastic, except that is hair is red, his suit is purple and his nose often grows and wobbles back and forth like a semi-erect phallus. Oh, the joys that are in store for you with SHOWCASE PRESENTS THE ELONGATED MAN: VOL. 1. Continuing to dig deep in their obscurity pile, DC Comics unearths another mostly forgotten character for a near-600-page collection.

Though he debuted in the pages of THE FLASH, Elongated Man spent most of his career as a backup feature following the exploits of Batman and Robin in DETECTIVE COMICS. The placement was apt, as the hero – known to the world as Ralph Dibny – is constantly solving mysteries as he and his wife Sue take trip after trip and spend lots of money. Dibny made his fortune as a circus attraction, you see, after drinking a soda pop he concocted from a wild fruit that elasticized his body.

Now he’s devoted his life to fighting crime. (And boy, does he get off on it! Every town he visits, he’s eager to check out what the local newspaper has had to say about him.) Whenever he suspects there’s a mystery to be solved, his proboscis stretches to the aforementioned penile length and bobs in a manner that both disturbs and threatens (see Exhibit A). The mysteries are impossible to figure out – not because they’re intricately plotted, but because they’re so absurd and ridiculous that they don’t follow any line of logic.

This to the benefit of you, dear reader, as the writers promise to “make you limp with excitement!” (And that kind of imagery doesn’t end there; one adventure has Elongated Man refer to “pushing the queer,” while another has him don a “gay nineties policeman costume,” which no doubt accounts for his cracking that “I’ll bet a can of lubricating grease they’re pretty tired of the whole affair right about now!”) His little antics – featuring the occasional JLA guest star like Green Lantern and Zatanna – are over and done with in nine quick pages, except for two “novel-length” team-ups with the Dynamic Duo.

That brevity gives you 51 separate stories (ranging from 1960 to 1968), in all of which Sue lays the spoiled-bitch act on thick. Her top concern seems to be spending outrageous amounts of cash on a new hat. My favorite panel in the whole book is when Sue puts on a sexy evening dress and Ralph exclaims “WOW!” as his eyes stretch out of his head and all the way to her cleavage (see Exhibit B). It makes one wonder if … well, let’s just say Sue may be the most satisfied gal in comics history. –Rod Lott

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OTHER BOOKGASM REVIEWS OF THIS SERIES:
• SHOWCASE PRESENTS THE HAUNTED TANK: VOLUME 1
• SHOWCASE PRESENTS THE HOUSE OF MYSTERY: VOLUME 1
• SHOWCASE PRESENTS JONAH HEX: VOLUME 1
• SHOWCASE PRESENTS METAMORPHO: VOLUME 1
• SHOWCASE PRESENTS SUPERMAN FAMILY: VOLUME 1