Sometimes after a lot of bloodletting, you need a palate-cleanser. To that end, there’s THE HORROR WRITERS ASSOCIATION PRESENTS BLOOD LITE: AN ANTHOLOGY OF HUMOROUS HORROR STORIES, edited by Kevin J. Anderson. From demons and manitou to environmentally conscious lycanthropes, the all-original collection aims to send up, rather than scare.
It opens with “The Ungrateful Dead,” which is a decent necro-vs.-zombie piece from Kelley Armstrong. However, it has the unfortunate position to have Joe R. Lansdale’s “Mr. Bear” immediately follow; this is not only the book’s high point, but the funniest short story I’ve read all year. Leave it to Lansdale to pen an account of a man reluctantly making friends with Smokey the Bear, who takes his human charge on a journey of boozing, whoring and murdering … and, if Mr. Bear gets his way, wiener-pulling.
Christopher Welch visits a support group for H.P. Lovecraft addicts in “The Eldritch Pastiche from Beyond the Shadow of Horror,” and has his own tribute fiction called “the literary equivalent of a Family Dollar store coloring book.” Meanwhile, the King himself narrates Matt Venne’s “Elvis Presley and the Bloodsucker Blues.” See, there’s a lot you didn’t know about the rock ‘n’ roll legend, starting with the fact that in his later years, he was a vampire, and then even later, a vampire hunter.
A suburban man attempts to play Frankenstein, to increasingly problematic effect, in Don D’Ammassa’s “No Problem.” Speaking of problems, two would-be hoodlums take to robbing the Arkham, Pennsylvania, Museum of Natural History in Baseball Cards to pay for that brick of cocaine that accidentally was baked into a pound cake, in “The Sound of Blunder,” on which F. Paul Wilson and J.A. Konrath join their considerable forces.
Steven Savile has one of the weakest entries in “Dear Prudence,” in which a man keeps revising a note to his significant other; its single joke wears itself out after the first go-round. Thankfully, Will Ludwigsen redeems this slight downer with “A Good Psycho Is Hard to Find,” in which a couple finds itself unable to enjoy sex anymore without the threat of danger, having survived a madman-with-a-chainsaw attack while counselors at a summer camp.
The ending to Mike Resnick’s “A Very Special Girl” puts forth a pun so groan-worthy that the Cryptkeeper would reject it, while some bong-hitting video gamers find their games of STREET FIGHTER interrupted by poltergeist activity, which they try to put a stop to by saying “Beetlejuice” three times, in D.L. Snell’s “Love Seat Solitaire.”
Jeff Strand writes about a bell that summons Satan when rung 666 times (give or take) in “The Bell … FROM HELL!,” which proves far more amusing than Sharyn McCrumb’s NASCAR-world-set “Dead Hand” — a real disappointment compared to some of her work in the past.
Closing out BLOOD LITE is Jim Butcher, whose DRESDEN FILES forever tread the line between horror and humor. Here, in “Day Off,” wizard/P.I. Harry Dresden finds his free time severely cramped when he agrees to help out a couple of werewolves in need.
Charlaine Harris and Sherrilyn Kenyon also are among the better-known contributors — and get their names above the title — but their stories aren’t among the strongest. BLOOD LITE has some bumps — one of them being Anderson’s neglecting to provide any kind of an introduction whatsoever — but hits the spot more often that not. —Rod Lott
OTHER BOOKGASM REVIEWS OF KEVIN J. ANDERSON:
• DEAN KOONTZ’S FRANKENSTEIN: BOOK ONE – PRODIGAL SON by Dean Koontz and Kevin J. Anderson
• THE LAST DAYS OF KRYPTON by Kevin J. Anderson
• THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN by Kevin J. Anderson
• THE MARTIAN WAR: A THRILLING EYEWITNESS ACCOUNT OF THE RECENT INVASION AS REPORTED BY MR. H.G. WELLS by Kevin J. Anderson
Related posts:
- Brother Odd
- In Odd We Trust
- Dean Koontz’s Frankenstein: Book One – Prodigal Son
- Odd Hours
- Dean Koontz’s Frankenstein: Book Two – City of Night
