DATELINE: CYBERSPACE

Sensing guilt over last week’s events, Ms. Book Whore decides to go easy on you this week. In fact, she pushes only one hard title into your calloused hands: CRIME BEAT, a non-fiction collection from Michael Connelly. Yes, that Michael Connelly.

“Before he was Mr. Bestselling Writing, he was a crime reporter on both coasts, covering cops and killers,” she explains. “This is a collection of that reporting. You know, dead officers, corpse handlers, kidnapped children…”

“Prostitutes?” you interrupt.

Her head whips around, anger flashing in her eyes. “Yes,” she hisses, and slashes your throat with her ultra-sharp Lee Press-On Nails, killing you instantly, thus making you unable to read our forthcoming review.