If we here at BOOKGASM were any good at sports, we probably wouldn’t be reviewing genre fiction for a website called BOOKGASM. Think about it.
That aside, a sports metaphor seems utterly appropriate this week, what with the World Cup playing to indifference all across our nation. Oh, and because our overly tired editor Rod Lott put us all on his shoulders and rumbled into the end zone for a field goal.* Here’s a roundup of Rod’s long, lonely week of glory.
MONDAY >> 6.19.06
Our new, newsy NEWSGASM feature is really hitting its stride in its second week. (Because we say so.) This time, we had more great news about the greatest channel on TV. No, not the Spice Channel, but the Sci-Fi Channel (MANSQUITO excepted). It has green-lit THE DRESDEN FILES as a TV show, and the golden age of genre TV (now) just keeps getting better. Also, we took advantage of Josh Hartnett’s hair for a cheap joke. We’re not to proud to stoop to that level, because that’s what you already expect from us, reader.
Rod delivered his first review of the week with his take on THRILLER: STORIES TO KEEP YOU UP AT NIGHT. Based upon the groundbreaking video from Michael Jackson, it details the King of Pop and Vincent Price’s unsuccessful attempt to molest a horde of rampaging zombie … oh, who am I kidding? This book is really a smorgasborg of suspenseful tales from today’s best thiller writers, and said writers use the characters from their novels to cook up some juicy morsels of excitement.
TUESDAY >> 6.20.06
The BOOK WHORE made her unseemly return this week, sans internal narrative but with plenty of new book releases. We got sneak peeks at SHADOW MAN by Cody McFayden, MAMMOTH by John Varley and, most notably, BLUE SCREEN by Robert B. Parker, in which the stars of Parker’s lesser-selling franchises must find a way to escape the discount tables of bookstores the world over.
The pulp awesomeness of BULLETS, BROADS, BLACKMAIL & BOMBS kept on swinging this week. If you haven’t been printing out these columns and toting them down to your local used book emporium, it’s the best way to:
a) Get some exercise, fat ass.
b) Pick up a week of great reads for less than $5.
Anyway, this week’s BBB&B (or “B4,” as the kids on the mean streets like to call it) covered TARZAN AND THE JEWELS OF OPAR, THE NEVER WAS GIRL (great cover), LOVERS ARE LOSERS and THE DESTROYER #22: BRAIN DRAIN, in which the ever-deadly Remo Williams heads to Hollywood and discovers – surprise! – a lack of creative thought. What did they uncover in #23? Untrustworthy politicians?
Rod Lott took the lotion from the basket and liberally applied THE SERIAL KILLERS CLUB on Tuesday, and he was none too pleased with the result. He discovers – and this theory may possibly apply to other books as well – that sometimes you can’t judge a book by its cover, thereby shaking the foundations of my book-selection habits.
WEDNESDAY >> 6.21.06
Without short stories to sustain its writers, science fiction may well have died in its early days. But thanks to master editors and magazines with awesome titles like Unknown, we now live in a time in which science fiction pervades nearly every aspect of our lives, save lawn care (yet). The advent of this form is anthologized in THE SCIENCE FICTION CENTURY: VOLUME 1, and Rod Lott, despite his pedestrian unwillingness to learn made-up languages or construct character-arc flowcharts, found these stories acceptable. Myself, I was lured into science fiction fandom by the promise of green women with moral codes that didn’t preclude liaisons with bespectacled teenagers from Wisconsin.
And I got them.
THURSDAY >> 6.22.06
Maybe it was because there wasn’t a chance of seeing green women, but I never read any war comics as a kid. Obviously I missed out, because resident iron man (Can he see? Is he blind?) Rod Lott singled out SHOWCASE PRESENTS THE HAUNTED TANK: VOLUME 1, as the perfect volume for reading in short bursts, Harried husbands rejoice! Finally, something to read in those milliseconds between "do the laundry" and "paint the kitchen."
FRIDAY >> 6.23.06
A famous college dean once said, "Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life." Surprisingly nobody’s ever said that to golfer John Daly, because, as Rod pointed out in his review of MY LIFE IN AND OUT OF THE ROUGH, Daly’s autobiography, the man’s had a heaping helping of all three. It’s that in-your-face honesty that resonates, however, and despite my opinion that golf is a waste of a good day’s sitting on the couch and reading comic books, if I ever picked up a golf autobiography, this would probably be the one.
And on the sixth day, Rod rests. He’s done such a fantastic job covering for his sorry, free-book-grubbing staff this week that Mr. Lott deserves a round of applause, as well as boob-signing opportunities. –Ryun Patterson
*Or is it a home run?
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